Long before I ever picked up the Lord of the Rings, the Hobbit had been a favorite book of mine. Like Bilbo, my life was comfortable, but I was also tormented by my own fears, sensitivities, and self-image. The Hobbit seemed to me like the ultimate story my life would have to follow for a happy ending. Although, much like Bilbo, I was aghast at the possibility of suffering and misfortune befalling me, the story arc of the book showed that embracing adventure and learning to leave behind the trepidation of the past was the only path to escape suffering. The transformation Bilbo undergoes taught me, time and time again from a young age, that fear was my true affliction and situations that scared me had the potential to be the most fulfilling.
My own path to overcoming these challenges also followed Bilbo's; although no wizards came knocking on my door and I set out on my adventures with aforethought (and a pocket handkerchief), throughout my formative years I sought out situations which pushed my comfort.
Standing on the side of the road for hours smiling big at each and every car speeding by while the arm sporting my upturned thumb starts to ache taught me not to fear the unknown. The unknown was from where my deliverance had to come - just like in wider life: the things that matter to us, the friends, occasions, lovers, and opportunities which shape our life and bring us joy can only come by chance when we are open to them.
The tale of the Hobbit will always feel like an essential part of me. I think that the idea of a creature as small and vulnerable seeming as a hobbit stepping up to the plate of life speaks to the child we all often feel like in scary and uncertain situations. If Bilbo can do it, why can't I?
1 comment:
I appreciated your post, but I would like to play an unconventional devil's advocate for a moment.
Yes, branching out is good and provides diversity and growth. But there is also something to be said for having the ability to be knowledgable in something and gain experience through constance. Like when people constantly say that they wish they were less introverted or say that they envy those who have moved around a lot. There is an amazing skillset to be found in introverts, and it's not as if being extroverted automatically makes you better or more successful; all of it comes from hard work. So yes, perhaps it is good to be like Bilbo and risk it all for an adventure, but let's not forget that he was also very happy before it and continued to make a life for himself afterword; his life in the Shire, in growing within and not without, was the true adventure
P.S. I am very happy that you have found strength to combat the self-doubt you had earlier on in your life. It takes a lot of bravery and hard work. I hope that continues in the future!
{Nienna}
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